Friday, February 24, 2012

The List

Growing up I’d often heard that you should make a list of the things you want in a husband. It would serve to help me never lose sight of the things that I wanted, to never settle, to never give up.

I resisted such a list until my freshman year of college when my best friend from high school and I sat down to figure out what I really wanted in a man. I had grown weary of striking out with the male species. Here’s what I came up with (with no edits, as much as I wanted to…):

Debbie’s “Perfect Man”

1.     Christian (not a baby Christian)
2.     Passionate (growing) heart for God
3.     Be spiritual leader (ground in faith)
4.     Still spontaneous/wreckless
5.     Wants to serve/selfless
6.     Good relationship with family
7.     Good sense of humor
8.     Good communicator (listen/talk balance)
9.     Athletic (better than I am)
10. Likes kids
11. Musically talented (opt.)- harmony
12. Artistic (opt.)
13. Attractive- bigger than me/hairy
14. Compassionate (empathetic/understanding)
15. Loves God more than me- still loves me
16. Patient with my stubbornness (someone I'm able to submit to)
17. Encouraging- words of affirmation
18. Be able to tease/playful
19. Dependent on Christ
20. Be real with
21. More intelligent than me
22. Someone who shows he cares in unique ways
23. Honest/trustworthy
24. Not naïve (knows what’s going on in the world)
25. Remembers things
26. Can interact with people
27. Doesn’t breathe loud
28. Isn’t a messy eater
29. Takes initiative/pursues
30. Ability to drive a manual

How’s that for a model of perfection (and someone that can’t possibly exist)? Sure, a guy might have a lot of those things, and maybe even a little of all of them—but in this list I didn’t allow room for imperfection, for humanness, for inconsistency.

Sometimes I think the reason we make a list should be to scratch off half the list. That perhaps we should, instead of hoping and praying to find someone who meets our specifications for what we’ve deemed to be perfection, be willing to recognize that a lot of what we want in someone is unrealistic….and unimportant.

My list reminds me of my superficiality, and how I had allowed myself to focus more on things that don’t matter than the things that do. For as much as I had good qualities that I was looking for in my perfect man (a lot which I really think are important), you better believe that the things that swayed my heart and emotions more were the things that didn’t hold much value.

If I were being honest with myself, I cared much more that my man would come in this perfect package.  There wasn’t a place for loud breathers, or unathletic nerds (but he still had to be smart), or skinny twerps who I could crush in a wrestling match. If he couldn’t carry a tune I’d lose interest, and if he lost part of his taco I’d question his tableside manners.  The funny thing is that even when I met guys who seemed to be the ‘total package’, they were prideful and arrogant and I couldn’t handle that either. Essentially no one could win. No one would ever meet my criteria.

Turns out no one is perfect (no matter how much I still want to believe that’s true sometimes). Turns out that my focusing on such a specific list causes me to overlook the good that’s right in front of me because it’s not packaged in the way that I originally wanted. Turns out that the Lord is much better at picking what and who is good for me. 

If you have a list…
I’d encourage you to re-examine the things on it. What of those things holds eternal value? What of those things actually matter? What of those things will matter when you’re old and gray? Prioritize- what are the things that you truly cannot live without?

If you don’t have a list…
I’d encourage you to potentially make one. Perhaps the reason that you feel so restless in this search for a perfect mate is that you have unrealistic expectations that you’re not even aware of. I mostly think we all have this subconscious list that exists and affects us—so, you might as well write it down and process through what things really are important.

Ultimately- be prepared to throw the list out and trust the Lord to bring you to someone in His time and His way. He might look exactly like you thought he would, he might not. Both are okay. Be open to the fact that the Lord might have someone completely different for you than you’ve always thought, and trust that different might be better.


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1 comment:

  1. :] I am guilty of being a list maker.... Last January, I sat and prayed for hours as I made a list of 48 obvious and super random desires for a husband. After the list was made, I spent hours praying over that list... praying for my heart to be open to never meeting someone with all the attributes, and praying for him to exist. I was consistent in praying over The List. By March 5 I had met the man I had been praying for... and over time it hit me that he was literally every single thing on The List. The only thing he seemed to lack was #32- LOVE to play board games. He likes them. He does not love them. I remember reading The List off to my mom & a close friend, all of us in complete shock that this guy was truly my list. I always thought lists were silly... and that I should not create some false hope of a perfect guy- and he is by no means perfect... but I will boldly claim that he is, indeed, perfect for me. He is a direct answer to prayer- my favorite, tangible gift God has blessed my world with. We were engaged 6 months later, and married 2 months after that, and now have a baby on the way... God is so good at answering. All this to say- I encourage anyone to make a list, to pray, to believe God answers and wants to bless his babies. :]
    -Kellye Tilford

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