Tuesday, September 3, 2019

A Whirlwind

It's been a whirlwind.

Like a...get a text at 6:30 in the morning and come home with a week-old baby 8 hours later type of whirlwind. 

It was last Thursday, and I was gearing up to leave on Saturday for another 3.5 week trip out to California to help with my brother's family. 

I tapped Kel to wake him up. "Kel...". 
"I know, I know, it's time to get up." 
"No... listen to the text we just got." 
I am sorry to be texting you so early but we have a 10 month old child that we have been unable to find placement for- it is a boy, and we also have a newborn baby girl that will released from the hospital today. I was wondering if you all would be interested in placement of one of these babies? 
Imagine our surprise to find out that we were actually officially licensed and certified foster parents in this way!

I don't know if you can ever really prepare for this type of moment and the things that you'll think, or the feelings that you'll have. My immediate reaction was that it felt impossible. We had committed to be there for my family during my niece's leukemia treatments.  How could we possibly take in a foster child? Truthfully, it had been so long since we had heard anything, I had personally taken it off the table as a possibility. It was starting to feel like we were weren't ever "supposed" to have kids.

But here we were - faced with some choices.
So we (...I mean I...) freaked out. We prayed. And then we went to work.

We felt like we needed to see if we could make it work out, so we told the placement worker we were interested in the newborn and that we were going to try to adjust some stuff (since Kel was also supposed to be traveling the following week).

My family was the most gracious and excited. When I called my sister-in-law to see what she thought, she reminded me that Berit's treatment had been deescalated to standard risk instead of very high risk, and it felt like the Lord's timing that we had just received that news a few days prior this unexpected text. They weren't even sure they would need someone there full-time.

So we kept moving forward.
Text after text, a knot growing in the pit of my stomach-- angsty about the unknowns and the possibilities.

We drove into town that afternoon to pick up a few baby things from the county that they were able to provide us (a bassinet, a boppy, some size 1 diapers...). We ate lunch at Chick-Fil-A. We drove to Target, to get a car seat... and some newborn diapers, wipes, a cat litter box (the essentials). We waited in Target, cart packed and ready to check-out... waiting for the text that told us that it was time to pick her up (and IF it was time to pick her up-- it was only 98% likely to happen).

We got the text.
We checked out.
We struggled through putting the car seat in correctly in the Target parking lot (which took far longer than we anticipated).

She was a lot smaller than I could have ever imagined:  5 lbs 7 oz - no idea how long. Healthy. Helpless. Ours... at least for a little while.

Before we knew it, we were driving home with the tiniest of humans on board.

We have had five nights with Baby K.
We've learned about diapers and Butt Paste.
We've learned how to stick tiny appendages through tiny sleeves.
We've learned about sleepless nights and constant worry that we've probably done something wrong.
We've learned about laundry needing to be done every single day.

We've learned that we are surrounded by family and friends who are generous, kind, and so willing to help us out during this crazy time. Within hours, we had baby girl clothes on our counter, baby swings in our living room, swaddles in our arms. We were given baby bathtubs, burp cloths, nose suckers, tiny gloves and socks, bottles. A meal train was set-up for us and we have eaten like royalty without having to prepare a thing. We have been so, so humbled by our community.

Kel's parents made a last minute Labor Day weekend trip to meet Baby K. Lee Lee taught us how to  keep her clean. B worked hard on our chicken coop (because yes, chickens...). They held this new baby like she was their own granddaughter, loving her as such until she is not.

We have talked and FaceTimed with my family often. Sweet Berit loves to see Baby K, encouraging her use of the binky. We have heard from countless friends who are excited and supporting us in this endeavor, whatever it may bring. 

What a beautiful picture of the Gospel.
A beautiful picture of giving and sharing with one another when they are need.

We literally had nothing prepared for an infant.
Now, I can barely think of anything else we could need.

We don't know what the future holds for us and Baby K-- or how long we might have her. But we know that we love her a lot and are thankful for the time that we do get with her. Pray that we would be good stewards of this little one that has been entrusted to us during this season. That we would love her well, that we would keep her safe, that her future would be one filled with hope and joy.

Pray also for Kel and I as we figure out the balance between newborn life, full-time jobs, and both of us being in school (not to mention tending of the Beal farm). Pray that we would trust the Lord in His timing, in His ways, and in His goodness.

It's been a whirlwind... but the best kind of whirlwind.

(Also- this is NO surprise, but my husband makes the best daddy).

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