Don't you just hate it when someone else is better than you at something? Especially when it's something that you love, when it's something you might even be pretty good at? Even if you can acknowledge that you aren't the best at something, it's usually pretty sucky when someone strolls along and makes you look like a newb.
We've been playing soccer a lot lately.. and while I know I'm certainly far from being the best soccer player in the world, I had probably gotten a little accustomed to the fact that I'm typically one of the better females around camp. You know, being at the point where guys actually pass you the ball because they trust that you aren't going to lose it every time.
In the last year we've acquired quite a few more soccer players...including a girl who actually knows what she is doing and can do it well. Very well. As we played today, I found myself feeling quite inferior to her athleticism (something I had always prided myself on).
Here are the series of thoughts that ran through my head, 'Well, of course she's good-- she played in college. I bet that if I had played all through high school and into college I would be as good as her. She also runs a whole lot more than me so her endurance is much higher than mine.....'
And this is where I caught myself.
Why is it so hard for me to let someone else simply be better than me at something? Why do I have to justify everything in order to make myself feel better? Why do I have to be jealous?
I've realized that it's not exactly limited to talent, either. It seems to happen in most arenas in life... in how we look, our personality, our jobs, our academics, our spiritual life...our romantic lives. Ultimately, it's the result of comparing.
We get all primped and ready in the mirror, feeling good about ourselves for the day and then the moment we encounter another human being we're immediately stacking ourselves up to them. Are we more attractive than them or less attractive than them. If we come out on top we walk away, patting ourselves on the back and feeling good. If we pale in comparison, we slink off...either listening to the berating lies about how hideous we are, or we explain our loss by providing a thousand reasons we look the way we do or they look the way they do while we're inwardly fuming with jealousy. Coping mechanisms.
I wonder what it might be like if we could just acknowledge beauty when we see it. That we might be able to see someone else, see them as beautiful.... and let that be all... instead of comparing ourselves and how we measure up next to it.
What might it be like if we did the same thing with our talents, our jobs, our personalities, our relationships (with the Lord and others)?
What might it look like if we let others be beautiful, good, smart, talented, funny... instead of trying to rob them of their gifts, instead of trying to make ourselves look better, instead of feeling sorry for ourselves because we don't measure up?
You know when you do it.... just like I caught myself today. In that moment I just decided, 'Dang, she's good...truly good. And that's okay.' and allowed myself to simply enjoy the rest of the game.
I'll leave you with a little something a wise woman once told me:
Put the measuring stick down.
After all, you shine in your own way... there's no need to compare today.
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