Tuesday, February 19, 2013


After a post like yesterday's, I always feel super vulnerable and pathetic.

I'll get the occasional pity text or email where people check in to make sure I'm 'doing okay'. It's nice and all... but not necessary. And when I run into people who I know might have read my blog, I always wonder if they're feeling sorry for me, or what conclusions that they've made about me. It's especially awkward with people who I don't actually know that well (which is almost everyone here at this point) and yet they know these deep wounds of mine. It's why blogging is ridiculous, on some level.

But, the purpose of the post wasn't for people to pity me, or know a ton about my life just for the sake of knowing it. I believe there's a lot more going on in the blogging than I'm even aware of... and I continue to pray that it would be a forum in which my being honest allows others to relate and feel hopeful, and ultimately be reminded of who Jesus is.

There's a lot of thoughts bouncing around in my head lately... a lot of emotions...a lot of confusion. But, in all of that there's been a steady reminder that sometimes all I need to worry about is today. With deadlines and tests looming in the future, with getting anxious about what could be and what might be... I've been assured that today has enough going on that I need to focus on.

Matthew 6, right?
That passage we recite to ourselves about worry and anxiety and typically it doesn't do a whole lot of good. It's become one of those that I just roll my eyes at because I've heard it so many times and it doesn't seem to do a lot when I get caught up in the middle of an anxiety attack, freaking out about something that is actually minute but seems catastrophic at the time.

But, what if we really took it to heart?
What if...when you wake up today, you actually set aside all the things that happen outside of today and didn't let your mind worry about them? What if we set goals for ourselves that were just for today without getting too overwhelmed by the word 'forever'? What if we begged that the Lord would help us in these choices, these actions, these things that we need to do... for today? That we trusted Him to be our portion, to sustain us, to fulfill us...?

It can happen with a lot of things...
  • Maybe you're stressed out about feeling like you need to lose weight. Instead of feeling the daunting task of what it will look like to lose weight over weeks and months, focus on today. What can you do, today, to make healthy choices? How can you eat better? How can you exercise? Today... not for the rest of this week, not tomorrow, not for the next month... but today? 
  • Maybe you're anxious about a relationship. Maybe it's ended and you know you need to cut off ties. Instead of looking at the long term of life without this person and letting the overwhelming loss of that consume you, focus on today. Get through today. Don't call them, don't text them, don't email them, don't stalk their Facebook. Just for today. 
  • Maybe you're a student or in a job and you feel overwhelmed when you think about the deadlines and tests and all the things that have to get done in a certain amount of time. Do what you need to do today and be a good steward of your time. Don't get wrapped up in what you need to do in two weeks or the end of the semester, but plan accordingly and do whatever needs to get done today without worrying about how the rest of it is all going to happen. It'll happen. 
We could keep going with examples, but I think you get the idea. 
I think part of the problem is the way we get so wrapped up in a future that we're not even sure exists yet and those worries turn into irrational fears that very rarely play out the way we think that it might. It's a lot of unnecessary angst because we cannot predict the future. It's unknown (I'm brilliant, right?). We can also get caught up in the future in a way that makes us create ridiculously high expectations that then cause a lot of anxiety when things don't seem like they are going the way we want them to. 

Do what needs to get done today.
Think about what needs to happen today. 
The moment you start living in the future (or the past...) is when things began to take a turn for the worst. 

As much as I roll my eyes when I hear someone throwing Matthew 6 at me, it doesn't negate the fact that it's true and that it's true for a reason. 

Today has enough trouble of it's own.
Let tomorrow be a new day for you... a day that you will focus on as soon as you get to it. 
But first? 
What do you need to do today?
What do you need to not do today? 
What goals can you set for yourself for today? Not for all of eternity, not for the rest of the week, not for the rest of the month, not for the rest of the year, not for the rest of your life... but, today

Let your life be a little more manageable today. 
Let's not live so much in the future that we forget the present right in front of us. And let us not forget that each present begins to make up our futures...

Ask yourself each day what matters for the day.
And, hopefully, each day we have one thing at the top of the list that everything else flows from.

It's a good day.
A day that the Lord has made.
You've been given new mercy every morning.
Praise Him.

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