I kind of have the theory that any guy can get any girl.
I'm not a sucker for love stories. I'm not someone who will tell the world that I love love. I do…but a lot of the times, love stories make me roll my eyes. But there are love stories that really make my heart smile. Those are the stories of the unlikely guy getting the girl. The guy who was persistent in his pursuit of the one that he wanted. The guy who was unrelenting in going after the only one who was worth it to him.
I love those stories.
Those are the stories that back my theory.
The problem is, those stories are pretty few and far between. Generally, if a guy asks a girl out and gets rejected….he'll usually attempt to move on with his life. He'll pick up his pride from off the floor (sometimes that takes a while) and looks for someone who might be a better fit for him.
I don't blame them.
Oftentimes, I'll encourage the moving on because I want him to have a girl that's just as crazy about him that he as about her. I hate the heartache that often accompanies the long journey of sticking with it... and as much as I can believe my own theory, I don't exactly have proof that it works (even if deep down I often want to tell him to keep trying).
But the guys that stick with it?
That don't give up?
That keep asking, and asking, and remaining even when there's seemingly no reason to hope? It's this beautiful picture of the Gospel to me. It speaks to something deeper that connects with my soul. It reminds me of a Savior who, no matter how many times we reject Him, never gives up on us.
Beyond being just this beautiful image, I do think it works (even if there isn't proof). I think when men are willing to take hit after hit, when they are willing to not give up, when they are willing to change up the way they are pursuing….there's a good chance that she's going to respond. When a man is willing to be patient, when he's willing to slowly ease his way in….to earn her trust, to allow her to see a fuller picture of his character and his integrity? That stuff starts to matter more. When he proves himself, over and over again, that he's going to be there…that he's going to love her….that he's dependable and loyal? Not a lot can top that. When a guy is that persistent, it's hard for a woman to not see who he really is and not want to respond to that kind of love and pursuit in a positive way.
I'm not saying that it's going to work out forever, but I am saying that she's, more than likely, gonna give you a chance. The moment she starts to allow herself to really understand what's going on, the moment she lets down her wall? She's going to want to let you in. She's going to want to see what this is all about.
I guess what I want to tell men is that... I think you can get the girl of your dreams.
Even if she feels so far "out of your league"....even if she's resistant, even if she seems like she wants nothing to do with you? I don't think it's impossible. It may take you years to get your foot in the door (i.e. for her to even be willing to have a conversation with you), but I think if you do it right... you have a shot.
I'm not saying be creepy or forceful or over the top. I am saying: find a way to get to know her and then speak into her needs. Be what she needs, what she wants (even if she doesn't know she wants it). We're not that hard to figure out, guys. We all, in the end, kind of want the same thing. We want someone who is going to love us no matter what. We want someone who is going to be there no matter what. We want someone who is going to see as at our worst and still think we're beautiful. We want someone who believes in us, encourages us, supports us....sees the good in us when all we can see is the bad. We want someone who inspires us towards better, who pushes us to become the woman we always wished we could be. We want someone who will listen to us, who will understand us, who will let us be who we are while simultaneously expecting more from us.
If you find a girl and it seems impossible? Be all of that to her, in any of the moments that you can.
Because, I think it's true.
Any guy can get any girl.
He just has to want her enough.
He has to think she's worth it. He has to be willing to do whatever it takes, no matter how long it takes.
I've seen it happen. I've heard of it happening.
And, whenever it does, I'm reminded of how truly beautiful it is.
Those stories point toward something greater.
Those stories point toward Jesus.
Those stories are full of hope, full of depth, full of moving past the things that we think matter as women begin to recognize the love that is being offered to them and don't want to resist any longer.
But, what do I know...?
I don't have any proof.
Just theories...
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