Monday, February 10, 2014

Gossip-Face

Do you gossip?

One of the questions on our staff application has to do with gossip. Every applicant gets asked to tell us their personal views and involvement with gossip. It's sometimes funny to read the responses. Most people are willing to admit that they gossip, but there's always some disclaimer about how they're getting better at it. My personal favorite are the applicants who attempt to assure us that gossip isn't something that they ever struggle with or partake in (kind of like the guy applicants who tell us they've never had an issue with pornography).

I recognize that it's unfair to assume that everyone has struggled with these things, but it does go back to me valuing honesty. Then again, we usually try to put our best foot forward in a job application. I get it.

But, here's the reality of the situation (at least for me):

I gossip.
I do.
It's not anything I'm proud of and nothing that I'm satisfied with...but if you were to ask me if I sometimes talk about other people negatively behind their back? I'd have to say yes. It happens.

Why am I telling the world this?
Because in my recognizing of how destructive it can be to people within a community, I've wanted to point my finger at other people. I've wanted to tell other people to stop....to remind them of how detrimental it is. Don't you know that you talking about this to everyone isn't going to bode well for your relationships? Don't you know how terrible it is? Don't you know that you're breaking down trust? Don't you know that you're settling in life? I sometimes want to scream...

And then, it dawned on me.
I do it, too.
Not always, not to everyone...but there are some people whom I feel I can vent to, people whom I trust....and so I, for whatever reason, think it's justified.

It's not.
It never is.
Truthfully, in my quest for honesty, I'm sometimes (to a fault) pretty upfront about how I feel towards people. If you're doing something that I have a problem with, I'll usually address it. I'm usually pretty open about what I think/how I feel (especially if you've upset me)...but that doesn't mean I won't go tell a trusted confidant what I told you about what I thought about your actions (i.e. Listen to this conversation I just had....etc. etc.).

In my willingness to admit my suckiness to you, I think there are some solutions in which we can all actually move forward within this. In recognizing a need to sometimes vent about our lives, I'm wondering if we can be better about venting in an anonymous sort of way. We don't need to name names when we are talking about our struggles in our lives to our close friends. And, no matter what we're struggling with, we don't need to talk about people in a way that is attacking or accusatory. There's never a need for slander.

If you aren't willing to talk to a person about the ways they are annoying you, frustrating you, hurting you...you shouldn't be willing to talk to anyone else about it. My painful confrontations have often made me aware of how much conflict arises simply out of miscommunication or misunderstanding and if we're just willing to sit down and talk to a person about it, oftentimes there can be much resolution.

I've also been made aware about how sometimes we just don't know that what we're doing is causing someone else to be annoyed. If I knew that I was chewing loudly, I probably would try to control it when I'm around others.... but unless someone tells me, I won't ever know. I think, a lot of times, we get annoyed by other people's habits (especially the closer we are to them) and instead of bringing it up with them, we just talk about it behind their backs. If it's something that can be changed, why not mention it? Or, just get over it and keep your mouth shut. Us talking about it isn't going to be beneficial to the person it's about in any way...unless we're willing to talk to them about it.

I think that we often forget the gravity of sin.
That we forget the gravity of gossip (which, in case you forgot, is a sin). Perhaps we rationalize it by insisting that what we're doing isn't gossip....but if you're saying something and you know that another person would be hurt by your words about them, you better believe it's gossip. I don't care who you're talking to and I don't care if they'll never tell another soul. It's still gossip. It's still sin.

When we say the things we say about various people in our lives... we can't forget the cost. We can't forget that blood has been shed for the forgiveness of that sin. We can't forget the gravity of it. We can't forget how destructive it is. How it can sabotage community, friendships, relationships...how it can destroy trust.

Can we be people say that we hate gossip and then actually hate it? Can we refuse to do it? Can we be slow to speak and quick to think through the things that come out of our mouths before we let them come out of our mouths? Can we not spread negative images about people? Can we be people who edify and build each other up.... who serve and love well... no matter how frustrating, confusing, annoying, socially awkward, broken someone is?? Can we be willing to dive in deeper to get to know someone before just establishing them as a person unworthy of your love and energy? As a person who is unworthy of kindness and grace?

Because people matter.
And our words about them matter.

I pray that our eyes would be opened to the weight of our words. That we would be people who avoid slander and bad-talking at all costs. That, even to our closest friends, we would speak about others in a way that is life-giving... no matter what they've done to us, no matter what they've said about us. That we would be willing to turn the other cheek. That we would be unified in Christ, despite all the differences that make us unique.

Friends...
We have to stop gossiping about each other.
It isn't an option any longer.
Man up. Go have hard conversations when you need to, with the people you need to have them with. Bear with one another in love...be humble and gentle.

It isn't a suggestion.
No more justifying, no more rationalizing. We just have to stop. And, when others try to do it around us, we have to stop it.

Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.

We have to change.
We can no longer settle.
Strive towards better in all areas of your life, including this.

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Sunday, February 9, 2014

Being Engaged

People make a lot of assumptions about engaged people. It's been interesting finally experiencing it firsthand instead looking at it from an outside perspective. 

I used to think people were kind of ridiculous in their public declarations of love for each other.
I used to try to tune them out. 
Mostly I was just annoyed, jealous, and I trying really hard to not focus on their happiness in this area of life where I was most certainly lacking. 

Because, if we're really being honest…I wanted what they had. Or, at least what I perceived that they had. I wanted to love. I wanted to be in love. I wanted to love someone no matter what and wanted to go through whatever it would take to love them in that unconditional sort of way. I wanted a love that was reflective of the Gospel. One of my mentors used to always point out this passion of mine, of this love that I longed to give and how deep that it ran. I'm not sure I ever believed her until now (mostly because my dark heart was well aware of my evil thoughts toward others). 

In past relationships, I used to hold back a lot. I never wanted to be too much. I never wanted to be over-the-top gushy mushy. I often feared that the things I truly felt and wanted to say were going to sound ridiculous, or cheesy, or be met with a rolling of eyes or a flatly recited: "I miss you, too…". And so I refrained. I didn't let myself say most of the things I wanted to say out of fear…out of insecurity....out of a desire to hold onto what I had. 

If you were to ask me the best part about being engaged, though…?
The best part of being engaged is that I don't have to hold back anymore. 

All this love that's been pent up inside of me for so long? All the love that's been longing to get out? It never fell upon the right person before. But now?…now, there's someone who wants it. All of it. He doesn't want me to hold back, he doesn't want me to refrain. He wants it... real, raw, crazy, imperfect, emotional love. Now I've found someone who welcomes in my irrational, all-over-the-place thoughts. Someone who loves my ridiculousness and is humbled by my desire to walk with him through life, no matter where it takes us.

We can dream about our future together and I don't have to wonder if I've freaked him out. I can send him multiple emails a day and know that he wants to receive them. I can tell him I love him a hundred times in one conversation and not have to worry about if it's too much. He gets to take all of the love I've ever wanted to give, and he loves it. I'm never too much with him. It's a crazy, wonderful reality. 

I recognize that in my past, while I held back, a lot of me wanted to make love happen on my own. I often thought that, maybe, if I just tell him this one thing that I'm thinking/feeling, it'll ignite something within him. Maybe I just needed to be honest with him about where I was at and then he'd be able to unleash, too….

Only, it never worked like that. Oftentimes, things would backfire. Oftentimes I would be too much….or not enough. Things were always just off. No matter how hard I tried.

I guess what I want you to hear is that there's a lot to look forward to. There's a lot that I didn't think about happening when I got engaged, but I'm thankful for the freedom that I've found. There's something really beautiful to getting to just be and knowing that it's okay (no matter how emotional and ridiculous you might feel in the moment). The unleashing of who you are in the safety of a truly committed relationship is incredible. 

I don't have to hold back anymore. 
There used to be days when my heart ached to really just love someone. Oftentimes I didn't even have a person in mind, but I knew that my heart just longed for that type of love. They were the times when I was probably the most confused with the Lord...when I couldn't figure out how and why this desire was so strong if it was never going to be fulfilled.  The times when I begged for him to take it from me. 

But He was faithful. 
And now I get to love. I get to pour out my love on man who receives it and offers it back with just as much passion. A man whom I hold in high respect and am impressed by every day. 

You may be rolling your eyes, annoyed by my posts about my engagement, wishing that you had what I have... and, I get it. But, I hope you don't settle. I hope you don't try so hard to make something happen, that you don't throw your love upon just anyone when it's not the right one or the right time. 

There will be someone someday for you.
Someone that you can be fully yourself with. Someone that allows you to say as much as you want, whenever you want... no matter how mushy and gushy it might be, no matter how many times you've said it before. 

Being engaged is incredible. 
And I'm quite sure that as we move forward and see what all life throws our way, that it'll continue to get better and better.

Because it's a love that reflects the Gospel in a way that no other love can. A love between a bride and a groom. A love that I'm honored and humbled to get to partake in. A love that I could have never made happen on my own. A love that I did nothing to deserve. A love that is only possible because of Jesus. 

Do not arouse or awake love until it so desires...  

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Thursday, February 6, 2014

The End

This isn't the end of the story. 

I think it's pretty easy to lose sight of that when we're in the middle of something heartbreaking, confusing, challenging.

This isn't the end of the story. 

Sometimes we forget that the 'right now' isn't forever. Sometimes we forget that just because we feel the way we feel in this moment, it doesn't mean that we're going to feel like this for the rest of our lives.

This isn't the end of the story.

When we're disappointed with the actions of someone else, or the "bad" decisions they make, it's sometimes hard to not think that they're ruining their life. It's sometimes hard not to judge. It's sometimes hard to not hold them to our own standard of right, wrong, good, bad. It's sometimes hard to think that there could be hope for them outside of what we're currently witnessing.

This isn't the end of the story. 

No matter what the doctors have said, no matter how bleak the circumstances look, no matter how awful it seems like it could be...

This isn't the end.
There's still room to hope. There is still the possibility that it could be different.

We don't know.
All we see is the here and now and sometimes our limited perspective drives us. It can often drive us into a pit of despair and sorrow. It can make us feel as though what we are currently in the midst of is all that will ever be. It can make us feel like there's no way out.

Zoom out for a second.
Recognize that you don't know the end. You don't know how it's going to turn out. You may never know.

Allow yourself to hope that it could be better.
Allow yourself to believe fully in a God whose sovereignty goes beyond our limitations, whose goodness goes beyond our own understanding. A God who knows the end of the story, a God who is making everything beautiful in its time.

There's much to hope in, friends.
Because we don't know the end of their story. We don't know the end of our story.

He might overcome that addiction. She might walk away from that sin. We might break out of our comfort zone and have an opportunity to really chase our dreams. He might miraculously recover and live a full and healthy life, despite what the doctors all said. She might walk away cancer-free. We might, actually, meet the man of our dreams...even when we've given up every hope that it could be possible. We might, one day, feel something more than the throbbing pain of the loss that we just experienced.

Don't treat life like your current circumstances are defining of your existence. When we can zoom out, when we can allow ourselves to admit that we don't know what's going to happen... I think that's when we can learn to be content, no matter what's going on.

It's a shift to an eternal perspective.
A shift to trusting the Lord in a way that maybe you never have before.
A shift to living more fully in the here and now.

Because we don't know the end of the story.
And there's something powerfully hopeful in that.

Your entries will remain anonymous

Wednesday, February 5, 2014

The Guys who Get the Girls (Part II)

I kind of have the theory that any guy can get any girl. 

I'm not a sucker for love stories. I'm not someone who will tell the world that I love love. I do…but a lot of the times, love stories make me roll my eyes. But there are love stories that really make my heart smile. Those are the stories of the unlikely guy getting the girl. The guy who was persistent in his pursuit of the one that he wanted. The guy who was unrelenting in going after the only one who was worth it to him. 

I love those stories. 
Those are the stories that back my theory. 
The problem is, those stories are pretty few and far between. Generally, if a guy asks a girl out and gets rejected….he'll usually attempt to move on with his life. He'll pick up his pride from off the floor (sometimes that takes a while) and looks for someone who might be a better fit for him. 

I don't blame them.
Oftentimes, I'll encourage the moving on because I want him to have a girl that's just as crazy about him that he as about her. I hate the heartache that often accompanies the long journey of sticking with it... and as much as I can believe my own theory, I don't exactly have proof that it works (even if deep down I often want to tell him to keep trying). 

But the guys that stick with it?
That don't give up?
That keep asking, and asking, and remaining even when there's seemingly no reason to hope? It's this beautiful picture of the Gospel to me. It speaks to something deeper that connects with my soul. It reminds me of a Savior who, no matter how many times we reject Him, never gives up on us

Beyond being just this beautiful image, I do think it works (even if there isn't proof). I think when men are willing to take hit after hit, when they are willing to not give up, when they are willing to change up the way they are pursuing….there's a good chance that she's going to respond. When a man is willing to be patient, when he's willing to slowly ease his way in….to earn her trust, to allow her to see a fuller picture of his character and his integrity? That stuff starts to matter more. When he proves himself, over and over again, that he's going to be there…that he's going to love her….that he's dependable and loyal? Not a lot can top that. When a guy is that persistent, it's hard for a woman to not see who he really is and not want to respond to that kind of love and pursuit in a positive way. 

I'm not saying that it's going to work out forever, but I am saying that she's, more than likely, gonna give you a chance. The moment she starts to allow herself to really understand what's going on, the moment she lets down her wall? She's going to want to let you in. She's going to want to see what this is all about. 

I guess what I want to tell men is that... I think you can get the girl of your dreams. 
Even if she feels so far "out of your league"....even if she's resistant, even if she seems like she wants nothing to do with you? I don't think it's impossible. It may take you years to get your foot in the door (i.e. for her to even be willing to have a conversation with you), but I think if you do it right... you have a shot. 

I'm not saying be creepy or forceful or over the top. I am saying: find a way to get to know her and then speak into her needs. Be what she needs, what she wants (even if she doesn't know she wants it). We're not that hard to figure out, guys. We all, in the end, kind of want the same thing. We want someone who is going to love us no matter what. We want someone who is going to be there no matter what. We want someone who is going to see as at our worst and still think we're beautiful. We want someone who believes in us, encourages us, supports us....sees the good in us when all we can see is the bad. We want someone who inspires us towards better, who pushes us to become the woman we always wished we could be. We want someone who will listen to us, who will understand us, who will let us be who we are while simultaneously expecting more from us. 

If you find a girl and it seems impossible? Be all of that to her, in any of the moments that you can. 

Because, I think it's true.
Any guy can get any girl. 
He just has to want her enough.
He has to think she's worth it. He has to be willing to do whatever it takes, no matter how long it takes. 

I've seen it happen. I've heard of it happening. 
And, whenever it does, I'm reminded of how truly beautiful it is. 

Those stories point toward something greater.
Those stories point toward Jesus. 
Those stories are full of hope, full of depth, full of moving past the things that we think matter as women begin to recognize the love that is being offered to them and don't want to resist any longer. 

But, what do I know...?
I don't have any proof.
Just theories... 

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Tuesday, February 4, 2014

The Guys who Get the Girls (Part I)

The Comment: 
Six months later he admitted he was interested in me the whole time. Why did he never say anything?
Oh my...
There's probably a whole mess of reasons behind why he didn't say anything and I can't even begin to deduce what it actually was. Maybe he was scared you were a rebound? Maybe he was scared you weren't interested? Maybe he was not in a place he felt like he should be pursuing anyone? Maybe he was scared he wasn't really interested (and just liked to entertain the idea without wanting to actually put any feet to it)?

Maybe he's just... scared. 

We can always come up with reasons to not do something. In fact, we're pretty good at talking ourselves out of things... especially things that involves risks and possible rejection. But, he may have had legitimately good reasons for not making a move, but we'll never know.



Mostly I think he's a moron (is that too harsh?)...
Here's why:
If he wasn't willing to say something at the time (or decided it wasn't a good idea), why did he decide to say anything at all...especially if he was never going to do anything about it? What's the point? Where's the logic? Did he even think through the ramifications of it all? Did he think there was a benefit?

And, even if he didn't say anything out of fear six months ago, was he hoping that your reaction to his confession would spark some sort of romance?

Do guys know that (generally) if they just take a risk and ask a girl out, that there's a really good chance she'll say yes? Do they know that them making a move is usually better than them making no move at all? Do they know that asking for a number, taking some initiate, taking a chance on a girl is one of the most attractive things to a girl? Do they know that girls don't always want to be the one having to flirt, drop hints, or bring up DTR conversations?

Do they know...?
Because part of me thinks, if they knew, that things would look a bit different out in the world. That instead of a small percentage of girls being asked out, there would be this flurry of confidence and excitement as men step up and take risks because they've decided a particular girl just might be worth it.

Men...
You don't have to know that you're going to marry the girl. You don't have to have everything all figured out. But, I guarantee you that it's going to be much more likely that you get the girl you want if you actually try to get her. If you put yourself out there. If you face the possible rejection. If you are open and honest about where you're at....even if that includes your hesitations and fears along the way.

Women are drawn to that type of vulnerability, that type of risk-taking...especially when they're the one you're taking a risk on. They see honor it, they see courage in it. It's attractive....even if they might not initially be attracted to you, even if they might not have considered you a possibility before. Once you put yourself out there, once you ask... they'll at least think about it. And, the more sure you are that you want to be with them, the more attractive it can be. We want to be wanted. We like being wanted. We like when guys are sure they want us (even if we aren't 100% sold on it just yet...).

Your chances are slim to zero when you're unwilling to try and get the girl.
Your chances increase dramatically when you're willing.
When you try.
When you get over your fears and ask a girl out (without being all wishy-washy and unclear about your intentions).

Be bold.
Don't wait.
Don't psyche yourself out.
Just do it.
I bet you'll be surprised by the response.
You might just get yourself the girl.

Your entries will remain anonymous

Monday, February 3, 2014

A Fear-Based Life

I've been wondering lately how often people make decisions based out of fear.

There have been a few conversations here and there where, as I listen to people sort through their reasoning for deciding something, the only thing I can hear in the process is fear. Fear of the unknown. Fear of change.

There's this fear that plagues us sometimes...and it soon becomes the decision-maker in our life. If I can't know the end result, I'm more prone to avoid walking down that particular path. It makes sense, right? We want to know that we're going somewhere that is sure to be filled with success, joy, good stuff. If we can't guarantee that, why would we head that direction?

It makes sense, especially, in regard to relationships. Oftentimes we don't ever want to enter into a relationship unless we fully believe it's going to work out. We go into relationships with every hope and intention that it's going to be successful....and if it seems doomed from the beginning, we usually bow out (unless we're just in it for a temporary good time). Honestly, even in a "successful" relationship, there can be a lot of fears there and a lot of unknowns. Sometimes, because a successful relationship is so unknown to me, it feels easier to get out and move into something I'm much more comfortable with, something that's much more known. At this point in my life, it's more known to end a relationship than it is for me to stay in one forever.

It also applies to future life decisions--like jobs, schools, moving. We want variables that we can count on. We move back home because we know people there, we know the short-cuts, we know which grocery stores to shop at, which restaurants to go to. We move to areas where we know people because, even if everything else is new, there's a certain stability to having a small community of people who know us. We take jobs that are within our realm of expertise, or different jobs at places we have worked before. There's something familiar that draws us to places... and that isn't necessarily bad.

I just wonder how often we are willing to step into places where we know nothing. Where we don't allow the fear of the unknown to be a factor in our decisions...
I wonder how often we look at our motivations and are able to identify them as driven mostly by fear, and then what it might look like if we were willing to remove that as an obstacle in our lives?

Are you hesitant to date that person because he's a man of bad character and you're not attracted to him at all? Or is it because you're scared of letting someone in... you're scared of a relationship working out... you're scared that you don't know what'll happen in the end?

Are you hesitant to take that job because it might require something of you that you feel inadequate in? Are you hesitant because it's in a place where you know no one and nothing? Are you hesitant because it's different than anything you've ever done before?

There's a lot of things that we take into consideration when making decisions...especially big decisions... and I'm not saying we shouldn't factor all these things in. But, I am challenging all of us to look at our reasons for them. Are they fear-based? Are the fears rational? Or are they simply rooted in the unknown? Are they rooted in a fear of change?

I don't want us to be people who miss out on good...on places/things that the Lord is calling to because it's unknown, because it's different, because it's new.

So, when you make your pros/cons list as you process through your life-decisions, I'd urge you to dive deep into the reasons why your cons are your cons and your pros are your pros. I'd urge you to be willing to jump into the unknown, especially if it has the potential of being good down the road. I'd urge you to walk down a path because you're ultimately trusting that the Lord is going to be faithful to you when you're open to new adventures and seeking to live obediently.

There may not be a wrong choice.
But, I'd hate to see us live a life of regret because of how we let fear make our decisions for us.

Your entries will remain anonymous

Sunday, February 2, 2014

Being Real

The Comment:
Why is it so hard to take off our masks? To take down those veils that we so carefully put up to keep people from really knowing us. It's like I want so badly to have those transparent relationships with people, but I freeze up when the time comes to talk to them. I guess part of it is the fear of feeling judged...but I know in that same vein that I shouldn't worry about that because the things that I'd feel judged about are all in my past. I'm not that person anymore. But it's still hard to be really real with people.
Yes.
Yes it is.
I've been thinking lately about how much I still try to hide while simultaneously trying to be honest. It's really quite exhausting.

I often ask myself: How can I be a good example, while also admitting the millions ways that I don't have it all together? How can I openly admit my darkness while not leading others down a path where sin seems justifiable to them? How can I fully take off the mask so that others are encouraged and challenged without simply seeing my sin, judging me, and rationalizing sin in their own lives (i.e. Debbie does/did it...so it can't be that bad, right?)

It's a fine line. A balancing act.
Then again, I don't necessarily think that the place for my confession of sins is via the Internet. My place to fully let down my mask isn't through various blog entries. I can be vulnerable, real, honest...but also maintain a degree of an appropriate amount of disclosure.

It becomes tricky when I allow that to extend to all areas of my life, though. If my closest friends, mentors, my fiance are never allowed into the inner circle of what's going on... that's when something is wrong.

I think it's important to ask yourself a few questions:

  1. Who are you wearing your mask around? All people, or just some? 
  2. Why do you think you're still wearing it? Is it simply out of fear of being judged...or is there another reason?  
I sometimes think that when we don't fully disclose every detail of our darkness (be it the past or the present) to everyone we encounter, we bash ourselves for not being 'real'. I'm not certain that this is the mark of authenticity, though. Who you are isn't defined by what you have done or who you might have been in the past, or even your current struggles. It shouldn't affect the way that you have to interact with people now. In Christ, you are a new creation...the old has gone, the new has come. In Christ, we put away our old selves... it's gone. It isn't who we are anymore. 

Living in Christ, in our new selves, with our new hearts... it isn't a mask. It's who we are now. The old stuff... it's fading away, it isn't what's defining of us, it isn't what everyone needs to know about us in order to determine if we are a worthwhile person or not. That stuff will come up as we get to know people and, yes, it's our responsibility to be honest about who we were and where we come from (because of the testimony it is of the Lord's faithfulness in how much He loves us and what He has done for us). It's also our responsibility to be honest about where we're at and how fellow believers can come alongside us and pray with us and encourage us (as that's how the body of Christ functions), but that doesn't have to be broadcasted to everyone you encounter. 

It doesn't mean you aren't real.
It doesn't mean that you're constantly wearing a mask. 
Full transparency can be reserved for an elite few. 

We can't expect our leaders in ministries to be perfect all the time, but we also can't expect them to tell us of their biggest indiscretions constantly (nor do we necessarily want them to). We trust that they have that inner circle of people who are holding them accountable, digging in deep, and that they're going before the Lord together. 

Because we're all a work in progress. 
But if you're hiding all things from all people...? Then, let's talk. 
If you're ashamed of your past? I get it. But, your story is that of one who has been redeemed and you may be surprised by the many ways the Lord longs to use it once you allow the light to impact it. You may be surprised by the number of people who have shared in a similar struggle or are in the midst of something right now. You might be surprised by how unveiling yourself (your past, your present, etc.) to people you encounter in various settings might bring about true life-change that you never could have on your own accord. Sometimes, in being transparent with others, you have to remind yourself that it isn't always about you... being vulnerable and dredging through all the gross stuff can sometimes be the most selfless thing we do if it means bringing about good for someone else, if it means revealing a bit more about the character of God and what Christ has done in our lives. Sometimes, we just have to decide it's worth it...even if we aren't proud of what we've done/who we were. 

Pray about discernment and wisdom as you share your life with people. Maybe sometimes you do need to broadcast things to the world (I mean, didn't Paul on some level??....Although we don't know what his 'thorn' actually was, but I'm guessing his inner circle probably did). There are certain levels of disclosure to have in certain situations/scenarios. 

But, don't automatically believe the lie that you aren't real or that your mask has yet to come off if you're walking more fully in the redeemed life that Christ has called you to just because it's sometimes hard to open up about your past/current struggles. There's a time and a place for that.... there are people for that. 

Walk confidently in who you are and who you are becoming.
Confess your sins/junk to a trusted few whom you know will urge you toward better and are willing to get on their knees with you. Open up about who you were when the time is right, and allow your story to be a testament to the Lord's saving grace. 

And above all...
Let's remember that our lives are not our own. 

You just might be more real than you think. 


Your entries will remain anonymous