The comment:
I'm a super indecisive person. Decisions are hard and even scary. Usually, I can make due by either letting other people make decisions or by just not deciding and suffering the consequences. But now, I'm looking for colleges, making life plans, deciding my future. It's overwhelming. It's paralyzing. What if I make the wrong decisions or mess everything up! I can't let others decide this sort of stuff because I'm the one who has to daily live with and in the decisions.
I'm not really good at the whole "let go, let God" thing. Im a worrier as well. I don't really know how to pray for guidance or allow Him to guide me to a decision.
I've only felt God/HS say NO/YES once when it comes to plans and that was regarding my summer schedule. I felt like I was confident and sure of where I did and didn't need to be. I'm not sure how to get back to that point where I can sense the plans God has for me? I don't think remaining paralyzed by fear is God pleasing but deciding the "wrong thing" probs isn't either. I struggle with trusting God with my decisions and seeing what God has planned for me.Well, the good news is that you're not alone. The bad news is that that doesn't really help in making the decisions any easier.
I think you have some good thoughts already forming. It isn't good for you to let others decide things for you because, yes, you're the only one actually living your own life. And, you're right... I don't think that being paralyzed by fear is what God intends for us at all.
I think we too often get caught up in wanting God to speak to us in very clear and audible terms. It would make it much easier if He could just tell us everything He'd like for us to do and every turn to make when we get to another dead end. Unfortunately, it doesn't usually work that way.
So, we're left with some decisions. We can either stay paralyzed in our fear, or we can do something. I think we're often so scared of doing the wrong thing, that we don't do anything at all... and that's exactly the opposite of what God is asking us to do. I just think there's a lot less 'wrong' choices than we think, especially when it comes to picking out schools and deciding on majors and jobs and all the choices we're faced with as we continue to get older. I mostly think that God is calling us to be obedient to Him wherever we are, doing whatever we are doing.
I heard a good sermon on this a few weeks back, actually. Using Romans 1, the pastor reminded us that we are all called to obedience, we are called to belong to Christ, and we are called to to holiness. Essentially this means that there's a lot of room for us to make choices as long as we are living in the fullness of these things. Being obedient, finding our identity in Him and walking in holiness.
So, as you're choosing schools... I don't necessarily think there's a wrong choice. There may be schools that will be better equipped to help prepare you for what you are going to do with the rest of your life, but you may not even know what that is right now. I think that's okay. Consider what you think is important in a school and why you think it's important. There are tons of factors that go into the decision, but, at the end of the day, I don't think that you're going to make a wrong choice... especially if you are seeking Him wholeheartedly.
There's nothing to be fearful of. It all works out. Talk to older, wiser people, but definitely don't feel like you have to do what they said just to please them. It is your life...and only you can know fully what you feel equipped for, called to (vocationally), and gifted in. Others might help in pointing those things out to you, but until you accept them fully for yourself, you'll never step into them completely.
I do think there are probably times in life when God specifically calls us to specific places for specific seasons in our lives... I just don't think that's always the case. Like, I probably could have gone somewhere different for graduate school, or for undergrad, or even a different camp to work at full-time... and while my experience would have been drastically different, I don't necessarily think that they would have been wrong.
The cool part is that God already knows what you're going to choose, where you're going to go, who you're going to meet, and how you're going to live.
Make some decisions and make them knowing that you've committed your life wholly to Christ... and if you're truly dedicated and intending on living a life of full surrender... I honestly think that everything is going to fall into place, no matter which school you pick.
Be obedient in love... no matter where you are.
Find your worth and your identity in Him...no matter where you are.
And strive for holiness, for being set apart... no matter where you are.
I pray that you find the freedom to make decisions, trusting fully that the Lord is good and that He longs for you to pursue the things you love, the things you are passionate about, the things you are gifted in...and that He has created you that way for a perfect reason.
There's less to worry about when we can fully believe that maybe there are multiple right decisions to choose from....and that we get to choose!
Embrace it. It'll be okay.
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