On Marriage

“How’s marriage?!”

It’s a question I get a lot now. Sometimes it feels like the question that a waitress asks you right after taking your first bite of food in a restaurant, “So how does everything taste?”

Gosh lady… I barely have my taste buds on this enchilada. But it’s great. I’m going to tell you it’s great because it’s too awkward and too late to offer anything other than that. I chose enchiladas and, goodness, they’re going to be good (even if they aren’t my favorite).

Marriage, while I do actually think it’s great… still feels a bit premature to give any sort of  “accurate” analysis on. Or else it just feels discounted. I can only think it’s so good because we’re newlyweds and we’re in the honeymoon phase. But, really… I get it…  my taste buds are barely into this marriage.

Before I got married, my roommate and I had a running verbal “Pro/Con” list about marriage. As I transferred from single into a dating relationship and then into an engagement, I felt pretty insistent that the “Pro” list should be longer (even if I never admitted it aloud). Because, who wants to walk into a life-long commitment thinking that the cons are going to outweigh the pros?

I’m happy to announce that the pro list is still longer and I’m not making them up or searching for little things to stack up against a long list of cons. In fact, my con list is pretty short. I imagine it’ll grow with time… but I’m also imagining the pro list will grow, too (I hope?).

But, so far, marriage is great. Better than I thought it would be, actually.

We still disagree on how to spend money or if we should spend money.  He still wants to cuddle as we fall asleep while I want room to thrash around and change my position at least 10 times in a minute.  We are still learning the art of communication and how our tones can come across to the other as negative and insulting. We’re learning how to have friendships together and also separately. We’re learning not to assume things.  We’re growing.

© Catherine Rhodes Photography 2014

I realize I’ve still only had a taste.

And maybe it’s just because we’re newlyweds and we’re in the honeymoon stage… but I’m content with what I ordered. I wouldn’t have chosen anything else off the menu, even if I had a wait a while for it to arrive. I hope I’m savoring every bite.

Thanks for supporting us, encouraging us, and loving us as we jumped on this lifelong journey of learning to love each other better each day. Thanks for asking. Thanks for caring.

It’s good.

Truly, truly good.

It’s almost like life can sometimes even be like a fairytale.

We’re thankful for these moments, even it it’s just because we’re newlyweds or because we’re in the honeymoon phase… we’re thankful for easier times and pray that these moments would serve to root us in the Lord and in each other as we inevitably face harder times.

And that’s “how being married” is…

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